Half Dozen Newbry Kids

#6 Sucking His Fingers

This blog is a long time coming, but I have a feeling it's going to be a long one so I've been putting it off. Had I written it back when we found out we were having a baby it would have been a much different post. Even if I wrote it back in March when we announced, it would have been a different post, but I've waited until now so I guess it's going to be what it is.

Kenny and I have always wanted a big family. I wanted 5 (until we had Sarah, then I felt like there were 6 kids for us) and Kenny wanted 4 or 6, not 5 because he didn't want an odd number. After Gracie came we toyed with the idea of stopping, but then of course, Daniel came (see the blog all about expecting him if you like.) When we found out he was a boy we knew we were going to have another one. We didn't want our little guy on the end with no siblings he could be close to. Sarah and Ben have each other and Gracie and Hannah are the best sisters ever. Daniel was left with no one. So we knew we were going to have another one, we just didn't expect him to come as soon as he did.

The last week of December I started to get hints that something may be not normal in my body. On New Years Eve day I finally got brave enough to take a test and surprisingly it had a very faint positive line. Now, it's not that we weren't happy to be having another baby, but Daniel was only 6 months old at the time and I was SOOOOO not ready to be pregnant again. I was in shock, though inside I new it was true, and Kenny was in shock also. I didn't scream this time like I did when I found out about Daniel, I just cried. I was so enjoying not being pregnant, not having a newborn, and the fact that I had just stopped nursing a few weeks earlier. The last thing in the world I wanted at that moment was to start the entire process over again. It took awhile to come to terms with the news. I've always been excited about the baby, but the pregnancy took a while to get on board with (I'm still not all the way there.)

We kept the news mostly to ourselves. With our life not being in the best place at the time, with this being our 6th child, and with Dan and this baby so close we knew some of the judgments we were up against. The few people we told were close to us and were people we knew would support us in this stressful time. Don't worry, just because we didn't tell you doesn't mean you're not one of those people. :) Things moved along slowly the first few months. I started to show earlier than normal, but I was able to pass it off as unlost baby weight and for the most part people didn't know. Then March 1st came and things started to happen.

I woke up a little before my alarm the morning of March 1st, went to the bathroom and discovered I was bleeding. The cramping started shortly after that and so did my freaking out. In all 5 of my other pregnancies I had never experienced anything like this and I didn't know what to think. I woke up Kenny, he called the hospital and they told us it would be best to come in. So, not wanting me to have to go alone, we called our wonderful friend Sara Hix at 6:30 in the morning, told her we had to take me to the hospital and asked her if we would watch our kids for us (she didn't know at the time I was pregnant.) We got the big kids ready for school, put them on the bus at 7:15, and headed over to Sara's house. It's so nice to have wonderful friends willing to do things for you at such odd hours.

Once in the hospital I had a bunch of tests done. They took my blood, listened for a heartbeat (which they couldn't find, this totally freaked me out) and finally ordered an ultrasound. I have never been so relieved to see a little heart beat on a computer screen as I was that morning. Whatever fear I had about this baby joining our family was washed away in that moment. I knew that no matter what we would make things work and that the most important thing was this little baby growing inside of me. I just laid there and cried, so grateful to still have a baby. The nurse informed us I was 14 weeks along and that though it was to early to determine, her guess was that it was a boy. I started to improve and after a few hours they sent me home, putting me on partial bed rest for a week at which time I was suppose to see the doctor. Yeah right! With 5 kids at home bed rest wasn't all that possible, but I did the best I could.

Since then things have been better. They never did find anything wrong with me, I guess it was just a fluke thing. I'm happy to have a healthy baby growing inside me even if I'm miserable. This has been by far my hardest pregnancy. I don't know if it's because of my age, or maybe because it's my 6th child, or maybe because he and Dan are so close, it's probably all three and then some, but I do know it's been rather hard on me. I have days where I can't really do anything other than just lay around because of the pain and contractions. Kenny and the kids have been really good to me and I keep telling myself it'll all end someday and it'll be worth it.

We officially announced the new baby in late March, which was a good time considering how big I've gotten lately. On the 21st of April we went in for an ultrasound and found out he is definitely a boy. We are so happy to be evening out our family, 3 girls and 3 boys, and that Daniel will have a brother so close. Our little guy is due August 28th which will make him and Daniel 14 months apart. This means I will have 6 kids 8 and under. It's quite a lot of kids in a short amount of time, but if you only count the youngest 3 I'll have 3 kids 2 and under. I'll admit I'm a little nervous for the first few months of this little guys life. That's a lot of little kids. I really hope he's a good sleeper and is kind to Mommy. It'll be a challenge, but it'll be worth it.